So a guy came up to me once and said “Boy your ugly” at which I replied “so are you, because least my face doesn’t look like it’s been put on back to front, didn’t you know mirrors existed until now?”
This guy looked like Fagins younger brother and did pick pocket occasionally too, and was a bit of a ponce.
All he wanted was to make a quick buck and always ended up with bad luck and never took a penny out of his pocket,
We called him “Tight Arse Gary,” and was known to many, but when he went broke only joke was him because whenever he had cash he blew it away and never saw him again, until payday.
Fruit machines was his best friend too and spent money like it was growing from his hands,
He liked a smoke and would give you a poke if you won more than him and he then ask me “Hey ugly would you lend us some money”,
At which I replied no and if I was a cash machine I would give a notice saying “Piss off you tight arse git and if you bother me again I will give you receipt saying any cash get it from your own pocket and ram something up your socket”.
So this is story of Tight Arse Gary who never paid a single penny, unless it was a machine where he hoped to win it back again!