When someone tells you your ugly

So a guy came up to me once and said “Boy your ugly” at which I replied “so are you, because least my face doesn’t look like it’s been put on back to front, didn’t you know mirrors existed until now?” This guy looked like Fagins younger brother and did pick pocket occasionally too, andContinue reading “When someone tells you your ugly”

Working the pubs and clubs

So soon I will be back to normal and be able to work the pubs and clubs again Stand up comedy isn’t easy but once you get that first laugh you know you are on a roll and so I have my gear ready to take to the town with my money ready to payContinue reading “Working the pubs and clubs”

Becoming a stand up comedian

Becoming a stand up comedian wasn’t easy, it takes a lot of time and energy Yet I knew I had it in me, telling gag after gag, making people laugh is the best medicine in the world Of course these days you have to be careful not to offend anybody, but at the same timeContinue reading “Becoming a stand up comedian”

I can take joke can you?

Tonight I am in lockdown, and want to frown as there is so many jokes I would like to tell There is one about a clown who name was Fred, and everyone was scared of No idea why, as he looked alright with his make up on As soon he took off his clown costumeContinue reading “I can take joke can you?”

My First Date

So tonight I am going on my first date in a whilst and haven’t told anyone as of yet, but when they do they’ll be surprised I met him in Oxford street where it is always busy and endless stores for that retail therapy He was getting his usual morning Coffee, where as I wasContinue reading “My First Date”

Mrs Delirious

Being on my todd today I felt like it should be PJ day and sort out some washing and ironing, when I realised I  had marmalade down my top from last weeks breakfast One of my girlfriends telephones asking would I like to come over, now I didn’t want to be rude, but what aContinue reading “Mrs Delirious”

Misery guts and the hostess

I met a boy who lived in a land of misery to the point he met a girl who was a air hostess and so always rather busy. They met on the plane, well she spilt drink all over him at which he yelled “Did you have to be so bloody clumsy” and she repliedContinue reading “Misery guts and the hostess”

Skirty Knickers Mavis

So I got talking to this girl I won’t name names, but she was a bit of a hay-ho if you get my meaning, and she looked like sometimes when she got angry that she was teething, she would take of her clothes give herself a poke and start smoking Of course this was toContinue reading “Skirty Knickers Mavis”